


Without Papyrus

by The_Crazy_Fangirl



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Bad Puns, Brotherly Love, Crying, Feels, Fights, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Genocide Route, I'm a terrible person, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Killing, Night Terrors, Nightmares, Sans Has Issues, Shy Sans, Spoilers - Genocide Route, Suicidal Thoughts, Triggers, Younger Brother Sans
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-12
Updated: 2016-05-12
Packaged: 2018-06-07 21:57:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6826099
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Crazy_Fangirl/pseuds/The_Crazy_Fangirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Papyrus was killed, Sans felt himself going on a downward spiral.  He was nothing without Papyrus. Everything about his brother made his life awesome, but all of that was taken away from him. He knew that he would never hear that ridiculous laugh, see that goofy smile, or solve puzzles with his brother ever again. Sans had to learn how to live without Papyrus. </p><p>PLEASE DON'T READ THIS IF IT COULD TRIGGER YOU!!!!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm a terrible person for making this.  
> PLEASE DON'T READ THIS IF IT COULD TRIGGER YOU!!!!

"Papyrus?" Sans called. It was a day like any other in Snowdin. It would've been better if he could find Papyrus. The snow was coming down hard, and his brother was nowhere to be seen, so he had no choice but to leave his room and go find him.  
Meanwhile, he was walking through a snowstorm, searching for his brother, expecting to find him quickly, but he was seemingly impossible to find. 

It was a huge struggle to walk through the deep snow, and gusts of wind knocked him back occasionally. Sans was starting to worry.

Where is that dingus?

Sans was sweating, even in the extreme cold. Where was his brother? He had already searched his entire house, all of the shops, he checked Grilby's, so now he had no other choice but to search around the outskirts of Snowdin. 

"PAPYRUS!" he called again, but was greeted by the howl of the wind and the feeling of cold snow on his face. In the distance, he saw a red thing on the ground.  
"PAPYRUS! This isn't funny anymore!" Sans cried. 

He kept trudging on, thinking that Papyrus had fallen over. He remembered when they were both little and Papyrus was always unsteady on his feet. Papyrus would always fall over, and Sans would laugh. Sans remembered giggling and saying, "Oh, Papy!" Then he would pull him up off the ground and they would both laugh.

Sans was almost to the red thing. He didn't see Papyrus, but that was clearly his signature red scarf. "Papyrus!" Sans yelled. "C'mon! I want to go home now!" 

He made it to the scarf, but saw something he didn't want to see. It was dust. He could barely tell it apart from the snow, but it was the dust that monsters turned into when they die. Sans knew that it could only mean one thing, but he couldn't get the thought into his head.  
"No..." he trailed off.

"Papy?" 

Nothing.

The wind knocked him over, but he grabbed Papyrus' scarf. Tears welled up in his eye sockets as he tried to process the thought.

Papyrus was dead.

"No... Papy, you can't be gone. You just can't be dead!" He sobbed, clutching the scarf to his chest.  
"Oh, Papy, she killed you..." 

Sans chocked on his tears and just knelt there for a moment, recalling each precious moment he spent with his brother. Already, he missed the way Papyrus would fantasize about joining the Royal Guard, the terrible spaghetti he would always make, the way he would groan at his bad puns, his laugh, his smile, everything...

That stupid human took his brother from him.

Sans was overwhelmed with shock and anger and sadness, and wanted to die, but no, he had to avenge his brother.  
"Papy, Papy, oh Papy..." Sans whispered his name over and over again, still full of denial.  
"You can't be gone! You're going to be at home when I get there and it's just a huge misunderstanding..." Sans rambled on.

The wind picked up and blew him over again. He still clung to the scarf for dear life. He was lying in the snow with a broken heart.  
"Oh, Papy..." he sighed and stood up, preparing himself for the rest of his life without his beloved brother. He wrapped the scarf around his neck, smelling the scent of spaghetti and who knows what. He played with the edges of the scarf, as if they would bring Papyrus back to life. 

Sans wanted to die. 

He walked home, sobbing. If only Papyrus were there with him...


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some Undyne and Sans fluff. TRIGGER WARNINGS

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM A TERRIBLE PERSON PLEASE DON'T HATE ME!!!  
> Also, please don't read this if it could trigger you. Don't be mean in the comments!

He arrived back home and yelled, "Papy? You there? I know you're here!" Sans tried to reassure himself that it was all a dream, but it wasn't. 

Sans felt tears swell in his eye sockets as he walked past Papyrus' room. There were signs and caution tape that said things like, "Keep out!" and "Danger!" or even "Enter at your own risk!" Sans chuckled and he became overwhelmed again. Tears flowed down his cheeks as he opened the door. Papyrus wasn't there. He just collapsed onto his brother's race car bed and cried as he lost track of time. It wasn't like it mattered... His life was meaningless without Papyrus there with him.

The phone on Papyrus' desk rung, so Sans reluctantly got up to see who it was.   
It was Undyne.  
"Hey, Papyrus!" she said. "Come on over to my place for training, you nerd!"   
Sans sniffled. "Hey, Undyne..." he said, his voice raspy from all the crying.  
"Sans? Oh, hey! What's up lazy bones? Where's Papyrus?"

He had to break the news to her. "Papyrus is um..." Sans tried to speak, but ended up sobbing over the line.   
"Woah, Sans, you ok? Did something happen?" Undyne asked, her voice full of concern.   
"I'M NOT OK!" he shouted. Oh man, he felt awful for lashing out at her like that and cried harder. "What the hell happened? Do you need me to come over?" she asked urgently.  
"Undyne," he sniffled. "He's dead. Papy's gone..." Sans almost yelled.

The line went silent.

"I-I-I don't know what to say..." she said, shocked.  
"I'm so, so sorry, Sans. I'll come over, just give me a little bit..." Undyne said, starting to tear up.

A couple hours later, Undyne showed up in Snowdin with some desserts she bought.   
"Undyne... Hey." Sans said as he opened the door.   
"I brought a cake, you poor thing." Undyne said. "I miss Papyrus so much already, but I know it's the hardest on you. Just stay strong, ok?" she pleaded as a few silent tears fell down her cheeks. She put the cake on the table and pulled Sans into a hug. She squeezed him tight and he just bawled helplessly.   
"You're tough, Sans. You'll be just fine. Papyrus is probably watching you right now, all proud of how tough you're being! Wanna watch some TV? You look like you could use some company." Undyne was also crying, but somehow coaxed him into watching Mettaton's cooking show with her. Despite being the most passionate, strong being in the Underground, Undyne was very understanding. 

Sans couldn't keep it together for much longer. He felt the tears swelling in his eye sockets and began hyperventilating.   
"You ok, nerd?" Undyne joked, trying to cheer him up.  
"No..." Sans said and gave her such a pained look that it made her want to cry even harder.  
She hugged him as tight as she could without hurting him.   
"I miss him too, Sans..." She murmured sadly.   
"He's watching you. He's watching over all of us. He was too good for this world..."  
"That human killed him." Sans said.   
"WHAT?!" Undyne asked in shock. "Poor Papyrus!" she said.   
"Yeah, the human happens to be a homicidal maniac." Sans mumbled.  
"A dirty brother killer..." he spat.

Undyne didn't say anything that would make Sans more upset. They just sat on the couch and watched TV. As Sans watched Mettaton chop up vegetables, thoughts of revenge crept into his mind. He had to avenge his brother, but Papyrus would've wanted him to spare her... He thought about that as the tears flowed.

"I know this probably isn't helping, but it feels so strange without Papyrus in the house." Undyne said.  
"Yeah... Like, even with you here, the house still just feels... Empty, like I'm in some kind of abyss...Like, because Papy's gone..." Sans said, completing her thought.  
"Oh Sans..." Undyne sniffled and started crying silently onto his shoulder. "I'm so, so, sorry..." Undyne chocked out through quiet sobs.  
"Want some of that cake?" she asked. When she pulled away, Sans nodded and sniffled. 

The cake was delicious. It was moist and rich, and was covered in gooey chocolate frosting. It made Sans hum with delight.  
"It's good, huh?" Undyne asked, taking another huge slice of the cake.  
"It's amazing, Undyne." Sans smiled. A moment later, a pained look seeped into his face.   
The cake would've been better with Papyrus standing beside him.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More sad Sans angst.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE BE CAREFUL READING THIS ONE! This chapter has the most triggers out of all of them, so please don't read this if you are easily triggered.

Sans had shut the world out. When he went out, he kept his head down and his hood on. Whenever he went to Grilby's, he wasn't as social, not that he was ever a social butterfly to begin with. Every time he went to work, he just felt so... Hopeless. There was a void inside him that only Papyrus could fill. He couldn't focus on anything without memories flooding back to him and breaking down. He tried to pretend that he couldn't hear the townspeople whispering about how quiet he'd become.   
One day when he was walking back from work, Sans overheard a little boy whispered to his friend, "That guy's so weird. Why's he so quiet?"   
"Don't say that!" the little girl hissed. "He used to be really funny. He always made really good jokes."   
"Wow. He's changed..." the little boy murmured.   
Sans sighed. The kid was right; he was becoming a shadow of his former self. He was quiet and stopped solving puzzles because they brought back too many memories of snowy days inside the house and the sound of Papyrus' laughter. He vividly remembered the week of the huge blizzard a couple years ago. Sitting inside the house and solving puzzles was all they would do for that week. He would stop watching all of the TV shows he watched with Papyrus because those reminded him of that one time Papyrus spit his coke out on Undyne after Mettaton made a joke, and she full on tackled him. 

He wouldn't even make skeleton puns.

Sans was never emotional, but he felt trapped and needed some kind of escape. He didn't care how, but he needed to get away from this pain, or cope with it somehow. 

One day, he found himself playing his trombone and just made music to numb the pain. The trombone used to be a joke, just something he'd play to annoy Papyrus. Now it was his getaway to paradise. Besides, it felt better than the self harm he used to do. He would play happy songs that reminded him that there is still hope, he would play sad songs to solemnly recall the memories, and he would play vibrant, angry songs about revenge on that stupid human. 

Every night, he would cry himself to sleep, and was torn between wanting to die and avenging Papyrus. He would always wake up in the middle of the night after a nightmare about Papyrus. He always saw vivid images of the stupid human killing him, while Papyrus just kept sparing her and taking the hits. He woke up screaming his brother's name in the middle of the night. He was panting and sobbing and hiccuping and shaking and the tears felt hot on his face... Sans buried his face in his hands and wanted it all to be over. He kept sobbing, expecting Papyrus to come in with him and stay with him and sit on the bed next to him, like he would always do when Sans had a night terror. He wanted nothing more than to hear Papyrus' voice and know that he was with him, but Sans was alone and vulnerable. If anything touched him, he would shatter.

It was terrifying to be alone, and Sans was never afraid. 

"Where are you, Pap?" he cried out through a waterfall of tears. "Please, Pap, I need you here..."   
Everything was so lonely and frightening. Sans was hyperventilating and felt like he was about to vomit. He felt his own demons of fear and sorrow creep close to him and strangle him. Why was this happening to him? He didn't deserve this...  
Sans laid back down and sobbed. "Papyrus..." he choked out. "I need you..."   
The tears blurred Sans' vision and his arms shook as he pulled the blanket up to his chin, just the way Papyrus would. He sniffled and rolled onto his side. Why did Papyrus have to die? What did he ever do to deserve to be murdered? Sans wondered about that as he sobbed into his pillow. 

More than anything in the world, he wanted his brother to comfort him and make him feel safe again, but nobody came.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is pretty violent, so be careful! Thank you all for being so supportive! It honestly means the world to me. :D

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I added some of my own dialogue to the fight, just so you all know. Thank you so much for reading this! :)

He was breathing heavily. The adrenaline pumping through the golden hall in the castle made his bones rattle. He felt terrible for what he was about to do.   
He was going to kill Chara, and avenge Papyrus, along with his other fallen friends. 

But Papyrus would've wanted him to spare her...

The paradox tore at his mind, but he couldn't give up now. Not while looking at the murderous grin that the seemingly innocent child gave him. He had no choice but to fight, or else he would be dead, just like his friends and brother. He had to avenge them.

"Kid, I've killed you 30 times already!" Sans yelled, dodging her knife. "I know you're never going to give up, so I'm going to have to end this."  
"Save your trash, for your friends." Chara sighed as she lashed the knife at him. Sans moved to the side.  
"You'll be seeing them real soon!" she mocked.   
"It's gonna take more than that!" he said with a smile, but it was just a façade, and he felt like sleeping, or dying, or something along the lines of his usual thoughts.

"Fine! I can do more than that!" Chara yelled. She was panting like a tired beast. Blood dripped out of her mouth and it was on her hands. There was a gaping hole on the side of her sweater from a Gaster Blaster. The skin on the child's side was exposed and she was grinning at him with a terrifying gleam in her eye.

Bones flew in Chara's direction, but she managed to dodge all but two. She hissed in pain and gritted her teeth. There were more bones coming at her with huge amounts of force. She yelped in pain as one struck her belly, and Sans gave her the most terrifying smile.  
"It's almost over, kid. Don't make me use my special attack."  
"Oh, please!" Chara laughed and felt at the aching spot on her belly. It would probably just leave a bruise.  
She was also terrified, but hid behind her wall of pride and confidence.

"But first," Sans began. "My brother would've wanted me to spare you. I'll give you a chance, but after this, no mercy."  
"I'm not quitting." Chara said grimly.  
"Here we go..." Sans muttered. He gave her a chance. He tried to fulfill his promise to Papyrus, but she threw away his mercy, so Sans had no choice.

He began blasting bones at her with all his strength. She could withstand each blow, but he had no idea how. His attacks were brutal, and the child still stood tall! Sans used Gaster Blasters and shot them at her, hoping that she would give up, but he knew that Chara had determination. One burnt her shoulder and she let out a cry. 

Sans cringed at the blood curdling sound. He felt bad for doing this Chara to a small extent, but she had to go, especially after everything she did. His happy ending was gone. He just wanted to have a good life with Papyrus and his friends, but that was impossible because all of his friends were dead. Gone. 

"I feel sorry for you, kid." Sans said as he flung her against the ceiling, then the walls, then the floor, over and over again. She eventually got back up, but was clutching her arm. Sans was in shock.

He was so, so tired. Sans still felt the urge to end his life, even if he defeated Chara. He shut the world out and sighed. Thoughts of Papyrus flooded his mind and so did ones of suicide. Life wasn't anything without Papyrus. He wanted to die, but he had to keep going for his brother. No, not just his brother, but also for his best friends who had faced the same tragic fate. No, not just his friends, but for everyone. Chara put everyone and everything in danger. Everyone's lives could be crushed in an instant, but he could stop that, but he was just so tired... Tired of fighting, tired of being alive, tired of everything. 

Still, Sans had to do this. 

He snapped back to reality and watched as Chara lunged at him. He moved to the side just in time.  
"Did you really think it would be that-"

She slashed him with her knife. Sans flew back against the wall. The pain was unbearable. He wanted to scream. He had failed at avenging his friends. He had lost to a child. Sans looked at her and smiled. At least it would be over soon... She kind of did him a favor, in a way, or at least Sans though so.

"It's almost over..." he thought. "I'm almost done..."

Chara watched with a stone cold face as Sans panted and stared down at the huge wound that traced from his side, and all the way up to his collarbone. His jacket and t-shirt were stained with red, and the blood also oozed onto the floor. Sans held back a pained moan and felt the tears swell in his eye sockets as he grew delirious.   
Chara became a phantom of the past and his vision blurred.   
"Well, I'm going to Grilby's." Sans announced.  
He smiled at something in the distance. 

Papyrus...

Papyrus came bounding towards him and knelt in front of him. He looked ghostly and was transparent, but he still had that glow that could light up a whole room. His eye sockets were filled to the brim with tears. 

It was his brother. Papyrus was there. Sans was smiling for the first time in what felt like years. 

"Am I hallucinating? Is this real? Am I dead? It doesn't really matter." he thought. As long as he saw his brother's face, it would be alright. 

Papyrus was there, telling him how much he missed him and how he loved him and how he had been with him the whole time. All of his words sounded like mush to him and the world looked blurry from the tears and blood loss. All he knew was that he was dying, he could see his precious brother, the pain was mind numbing, and he wanted to go to Grilby's with Papyrus. He stood up and started limping away from Chara. Papyrus was walking next to him. Sans could see tears running down his brother's face. 

"Do you want anything, Papyrus?" he asked drowsily. Sans gasped as a bright light blinded him and then he blacked out.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> See? I'm not completely evil!!!! :D

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THANK YOU ALL SOOOOOOO MUCH!!!

"Sans?" a familiar voice asked.   
"Sans? Wake up!"   
Sans moaned. He was comfy. He didn't want to get up. He felt like he was lying on a cloud. Then again, he never liked getting up.  
"It is I, the Great Papyrus!" he proclaimed.  
"Papy?" Sans murmured. He felt his abdomen. There was no wound there anymore. Was this all some sick dream?   
He sat up. "Papy! You're here!" Sans nearly yelled. His eye sockets filled with tears of joy. 

He was in Papyrus' room, lying on the race car bed. Everything was a carbon copy of Papyrus' room.   
"Yes, Sans. It is I, the Great Papyrus!"   
"I missed you so much, Papy..." he sighed as he hugged his brother and cried.   
"I AM TERRIBLY CONFUSED! YOU NEVER CALL ME BY THAT NICKNAME!" Papyrus said.   
"Long story..." he murmured.   
"I thought you were gone for good! I thought I'd never see you again..." Sans rambled.  
"DO NOT WORRY, BROTHER. I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS AM HERE."  
"Oh, Papy..." Sans sighed happily.   
Papyrus kept Sans in his embrace for what felt like forever.   
"DO NOT WORRY, SANS! WE'RE FAR AWAY FROM THE UNDERGROUND NOW."  
"You mean, Heaven?" Sans asked as he pulled away and smiled.  
"I, WELL, I GUESS SO." Papyrus said.  
"I'm just glad you're here now. Ready to go to the big Grilby's in the sky?" Sans joked.  
Papyrus have him an annoyed look. Sans kept smiling.  
"I'm sure it'll be a skeleTON of fun!" Sans winked and Papyrus tried to keep a straight face. 

Sans realized that it was the first pun he had made in so long.

"What?" Sans asked. "Don't judge me. I put a lot of backBONE into these puns!" Papyrus sighed and smiled.

Everything was ok now. The flowers were blooming, the birds were singing, and those two kids were eating at Grilby's. As Sans ate, he thought about how familiar everything was. Apparently, Heaven was a carbon copy of the Underground! He kept wondering why this could be, and then it hit him. 

Everything was supposed to be happy in Heaven. It was supposed to be where everything you loved is. Sans was happy with Papyrus and his other friends. It didn't matter where they were as long as they were together. Being with his friends, especially Papyrus, was Heaven to him. Sans smiled at the thought as he watched Papyrus eat his food like a slob. He chuckled and glanced down at his own plate. The food tasted even better with Papyrus next to him.


End file.
